Divorce – Who Needs Furniture?

An excerpt from the book, Divorce, Who Needs Furniture Anyway?

I never would have thought it could happen to me. I have spent endless days evaluating the things that has brought me to this moment of truth. I am going through a divorce. I am single again. What was a ten year investment has crashed like the economy and I find myself handed a pink slip reminding me that I am no longer needed for my services. I am beyond crying I am shell shocked, as I look at her boxes as they fill a home that was designed for us. I flip channels on the TV because I can only assume that this is a romantic movie and somehow the love and romance will soon spark and somehow it will be fixed. Needless to say that time never came as I still get caught in ignoring the world around me as it is packed away. I sit and sip wine as if you were still sitting here. Only to remind myself that it was only my imagination, that you have never sat next to me. Feeling disgusted that i am caught dreaming about a dream. Dreaming of a world by which two people are in love with the thought of being in love. That we both live in a world of us and and everything else is just in it. That time never arrived as the movers have pulled up to the house. I was naive to the warning signs. That this marriage was long over, I guess when communication was like having a business meeting and sex was like an appointment, that just might be a sign that the relationship is over. However, I loved as If I was blind. While the movers start loading the truck.

We sit and talk for the last time, civil like friends. Reflect on the good times you wish me the best and I tell you I hope you find the happiness you could not find in me. Then we both agree that our little girl would stay with me and we will raise her together. Then Bobby the mover asked are you about ready. You nod with a yes. We hug for the last time. I walk you to the door I wave as you get into your car and drive away. As I locked the door, an epiphany in my heart arose that I was locking a door to season of my life that was over. That my life at this point would forever be different. The way I look at my life, love, and relationships will forever be changed.

I cry because I feel free to love again, but I am nervous about starting over again. Optimistic about the new life that I will design for me and my child, nevertheless scared of failure. Wanting to date but stuck with 1993 pick up lines. I have a swag that is unbelievable but I will not play games. Wanting to get my groove on but I am stuck reading bedtime stories and watching Hannah Montana. Refuse to parent from a cell phone as I try to start my life over again. Have to get my hustle on but the daycare close at 5:30 and bedtime is at 8. My parents say I doing a good job, I said that this is all their fault. That they cursed me, that all they have ever taught me was how to be married, I don’t know how to be single. I would have never thought that this would be apart of my journey. Who would have ever thought that Love would have to learn how to love again . What the hell, who needs furniture anyway. She left me with a TV and the Nintendo Wii.

Antonio Love is a recently divorced father who is currently raising his daughter. He is also the author of Talking What Ya Want and Divorce, Who Needs Furniture Anyway. For more information on Antonio Love and his movement, please visit www.antoniolove.com.