Our Favorite Hollywood Blended Family – The Smiths

The Smith Family

The Smith family, which includes actor Will Smith, his beautiful wife, actress, Jada Pinkett-Smith and their 3 children, Trey (from Will’s prior marriage), Jaiden and Willow, are one of my favorite Hollywood blended families. The entire family, including Will’s ex-wife, Sheree and her husband, former NFL player, Terrell Fletcher appeared on the show.

When Oprah expressed that stepmom and ex-wife apparently get along, Jada responded by saying that she and Sheree made a conscious effort, early on, to get along.

“Sheree and I BOTH had to make that decision because at the end of the day, we had Trey and he had to be our primary focus,” she says. “So we had to put aside our own craziness, our stuff, all the baggage that comes with it. She and I just had to focus on, ‘What does he need?’”

The equally beautiful and marvelous, Sheree Fletcher, also chimed in by saying that while getting to that place took time and lots of “conversation”, it was extremely important.

Sheree Fletcher

“You realize, [Will and I] had our chance, now it’s about those kids,” said Sheree.

Will and Jada also discussed their plan for marriage, specifically called a Marriage Business Plan. This plan outlines their goals for their life and marriage.

“If you don’t have a purpose for your relationship, if you don’t have a place that you’re going, something that you want to accomplish, something that you want to do, you can really get lost in the murk of the journey,” Will says. “There has to be a vision. Like, why are we together?”

Will and Jada also said that they stay out of the spotlight (drama) because they believe the higher power put them together. As such, they focus on the greater purpose of their marriage instead of focusing on the drama. In turn, they have been able to create and sustain wonderful relationships within their blended family and raise 3 incredibly grounded children in Hollywood.

A very big round of applause goes to the Smith’s blended family for creating a solid marriage for their children and putting all the craziness (as Jada describes) aside to create a healthy family for their children. I LOVE IT!!!!

Stepmom, Jada Pinkett-Smith’s Aha Moment: She tried to micromanage the world. By letting go and doing less, actress Jada Pinkett Smith realized she could actually be more.

Source: The Oprah Show and Oprah.com

Elizabeth Edwards: Courageous or Cowardly?

“Courage:  The ability to face danger without fear”

“Coward:  One who shows ignoble fear in the face of pain or danger.”

Elizabeth Edwards has been all over the news networks, Oprah and Larry King Live discussing the release of her new memoir, “Resilience.”

A lot of the commentary has been positive, but Elizabeth has also come under fire for not only writing a book about her husband’s affair with Rielle Hunter but also about her decision to stand by her husband, John Edwards.  During her interview with Oprah, Elizabeth seems to refuse to place blame where 99.9% of the blame is due, and that is on her husband.  Instead, she chooses to blame Ms. Hunter for seducing him.  Although I can cannot completely imagine the pain she must be feeling, and certainly I can understand her thought process, I feel John Edwards is the responsible party and she should place blame where blame is due and that is on her husband.   Sure, Ms. Hunter played a huge role in this situation and both parties involved in affairs are to blame, but when you are married, the choice you make regarding YOUR marriage is YOUR responsibility.

In my opinion, all along the campaign trail, women thought John Edwards was “HOT” (this is how Mrs. Edwards describes Ms. Hunter’s way of seducing her husband). My problem with him is that the first time he was seriously approached by a woman, he folded like a deck of cards at a poker game.   Only this time, Mr. Edwards turned out to be the “JOKER.”

In Elizabeth Edwards’ defense, she is terminally ill.   When I put this all in perspective, I cannot even begin to imagine what she must be going through inside.  Not only has she had to deal with public humiliation (i.e., not just dealing with a very publicly-known affair — but possibly a love child being involved as well) but she also has this dark cloud of cancer hanging over her head and the reality of one day leaving her small children, not mention the fact that she has already faced the worst thing imaginable and that is losing a child.  Mr. & Mrs. Edwards lost their 16 year old son, Wade, in a car accident in 1995.  Maybe writing this book and speaking up is therapeutic for her.  Maybe it is her way of venting and telling her side of the story.  I so vividly remember when Hillary Clinton stood by her husband, our former President, and did not speak up or even half way address his issues or her feelings on the matter.  Hillary was criticized by the media and the American people for not doing so.  Now, Elizabeth Edwards DOES speak up after-the-fact, after having some time to heal a bit, and she is equally chastised and criticized for doing so.  This is very disturbing to me.  What does this really say about us as human beings?  Whether she knew before or after he decided to run is a moot point.  It is her choice to decide to stay in her marriage, no if ands or buts about it.

In speaking about why she wrote the book, Mrs. Edwards says she wanted to leave a last “letter” or “memoir” for her children.  She went on to say that her breast cancer has spread to her bones and currently is in her thigh bone.  To me, if this courageous woman wants to tell her side of the story, no matter what she knew, didn’t know; no matter how she felt or didn’t feel, then SO BE IT.   The public and the news media need to get over themselves!  Mrs. Edwards’ decision to stay with her husband and continue to follow him in his political aspirations at the time is not only her own personal choice, but her right as a human being, his wife and the mother of his children.  She may not have had faith in him as her husband at that time, but she very well could have still had faith in his political agenda.  That’s all that matters.

Mrs. Edwards’ situation saddens me because as women, we are “damned if we do and damned if we don’t.” If we stay, and then talk about our challenges and triumphs, we are scorned.  If we stay and we DONT talk about anything, we are still scorned.  If we leave, we are quitters and not courageous and strong enough to control and handle our own situations and lives.

This memoir will be on the top of my reading list.  I encourage all of our BFSO readers to do the same.  This book is not just about John Edwards and his affair.  It is about the challenges we face in life and how to go about facing them with honor.  To me, Mrs. Edwards is not only RESILIENT, but STRONG-WILLED, COURAGEOUS, HONORABLE AND A WOMAN TO BE ADMIRED.

“Resilience:  The ability to recover rapidly in the FACE OF MISFORTUNE”

I will continue to pray for this family and for Mrs. Edwards.

Peace and Continued Blessings,
Di

In the Motherhood

I’m watching Oprah and she’s talking about motherhood. Actress, Cheryl Hines from the new show, In The Motherhood, is talking about the show and several other mothers from around the country are talking about the joys and pitfalls of motherhood.  Additionally, all of the audience is filled with mothers.

As I sit and I watch, honestly, my eyes are rolling in the back of my head and I’m thinking to myself; “what are they whining about?” Now I know that their issues are valid as being a mom is one of the HARDEST thing I’ve ever done. But…being stepmom tops that!!! We deal with the same joys, but  MANY MORE PITFALLS. I challenge all of my traditional moms to think about this – try doing everything that you do, plus deal with someone else’s kids, even crazier schedules, a new baby, an ex-wife who can’t stand you,  a husband who doesn’t understand you, and feel under appreciated and attacked all at the same time!!! After that, you’ll soon realize that you really don’t have it that bad at all.

*Kela*