Dressing for that Baby Bump

Yes, I have had three daughters and yes, I have suffered through the agony of maternity clothes so I understand your strife! I’ve never experienced a “baby bump” but more of a “baby MOUNTAIN” with each of my girls. The bright side is that even since I had my youngest daughter (age 5) maternity styles have gotten way better.

One thing I did learn was how to streamline my closet. I had to realize that I wasn’t going to be pregnant forever (though it felt like it) so I had to make the most of the pieces I added to my wardrobe for these times in my life. It’s fun for a while to borrow your husband’s shirts but then it’s not so cute toward the end. You need your own stuff to keep your personal style even during the time of a growing belly.

Let’s start with with the MUST HAVE’s – these are the pieces that you will NEED during pregnancy and the basics for your new body. They will take you from the office to the park. These are staples that can be built upon with the “fun” and “trendy” items.

  • Maternity Jeans – if you buy a pair of “extended size” jeans they will last in every phase of pregnancy so that saves on cost.

  •  White T
  • Black T
  • Black Pants

  •  Maxi Dress of any color
  •  Black Skirt (long or short – up to you)
  • Maternity Undies (I know they seem huge but at the end you will THANK ME!)
  • Bathing Suit

So now you’re thinking “that’s it”? Yes. The rest you can go wild with like awesome statement jewelry, scarves, bright bold T’s that are so inexpensive, and, of course, awesome shoes!!! As much as I, personally, don’t care for flats I must admit there are some really cute ones out there and they are a MUST for swollen ankles and feet J A wedge can be your friend during this time as well. My fave motto is that “accessories always fit” so go crazy!

In addition to the basics remember to add color to your look. Now I’m not one to talk as I wore black all the time but I did that for work purposes mostly and I thought it was more slimming – LOL. Knowing what I know now I could have had more fun with color. Doing all of one color is slimming no matter what the color so be bold and have fun this Spring. Then you are able to add those fun pieces that stand out – maybe even more than your adorable belly.

Remember you don’t have to spend a lot to get a lot. Some stores have gotten smart and have begun offering “maternity bundles”!!! Here are some suggestions on making this the best time of your life without breaking the bank.

Live life well and ENJOY!

 

Julia Rutland is the Founder and Owner of Aesthetic Design Style House located in Indianapolis, Indiana. For more information about Julia, her company and the services she has to offer, please visit her website at: www.aestheticdesignstyle.com.

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The Only Child

four facesThirteen years ago I had a beautiful baby boy! His father and I were overjoyed. He was perfect; so perfect that I decided that I didn’t want or need anymore children. I was perfectly fine with him being my only child. I had a rough pregnancy and his father worked out of the country for most of the year. Children, if you are a full-time parent, require 100% of your time and one was all I could take. Even when the relationship with his dad didn’t work out, I still vowed that my son would be the only child. People would always say things like, “Won’t you want one with your husband when you get married?” Or, they would wonder what would happen to my son when his parents died. Who would be his support system? Who would he visit during the holidays, etc.?  I have to admit that those last questions got to me. The one future thing I was definitely worried about was him being alone! I wanted him to have brothers and sisters, but I just didn’t want to be the one to have them. 

When his dad got married and was expecting a child soon after, I was happy for my son. Finally, after 5 years of being an only child, he would be a big brother. It took some time for him to get used to the idea, but 8 years later, they both adore each other. I could finally have some peace with this now because I knew that my son and his brother would always be there for each other; I would make sure of it by supporting and encouraging their relationship whole heartedly. There’s nothing like a bond between brothers and I was so happy that my son would finally experience it.

It turns out that my son’s younger brother wouldn’t be the only addition to the family. Last year, his stepmother informed us that she was expecting a baby girl and gave birth to her in November. My son was elated! It’s so cute to see how he speaks of his only sister. Already, he is so protective and talks about the things he is going to do with her when he starts driving. This little girl is definitely going to get the blues from her two older brothers when she gets older. LOL!

And we’re still not done folks because last September, after vowing to never have another, not trying to and being told by doctors that I probably wouldn’t get pregnant again, my husband and I were surprised to hear that we too were expecting. I gave birth to my son’s youngest sibling, a beautiful baby boy, in March of this year. The six months of bedrest, including hospital bedrest, constant vomitting and fatigue, was all worth the daily opportunity that I get to see my two boys interact. My oldest is so gentle, loving and caring with his baby brother, and my baby boy absolutely adores his older brother. His face lights up every time he walks in the room or hears his voice. It is the cutest thing.

Today, I am no longer worried about either one of my sons when their parents leave this Earth because I know that they will always have each other. Not only that, they will also have my oldest son’s brother and sister. My son often talks about the things that all of them will do together in the future. He loves being an older brother. It’s the reason why I encourage and support sibling relationships in the stepfamily. A wonderful aunt, close cousin or a bestfriend cannot compare to a relationship that, if nurtured and supported, you can have with your sibling.  And so, my oldest son went from being the only child to the oldest of 4, and I couldn’t be happier – for him.

How important is it for you to support and encourage the sibling relationships in your stepfamily?

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Babies after age 35

janetjackson1Tyra Banks has this segment on her show called 20 questions. During this segment she gets to ask celebrity guests 20 questions about any and everything. On a recent show she asked Janet Jackson this question – when are you going to have children? Her response went something like this:

 

“Everybody keeps asking me that question. Honestly, I’m in no rush. I mean it’ll happen when it’s supposed to. I have time. I’m still young.”

 

“How old are you,” Tyra asked?

 

“41, so I’ve got time,” Janet replied.

 

Although Janet Jackson’s youthful look is still the envy of even some women in their 20’s, can it be limited to just that – a look? Does it mean that her body can still withstand the twists, turns and changes that pregnancy can put it through?

 

Many times remarried couples go back and forth when deciding to have a baby between them. Often times these couples have gone through at least one marriage, have multiple children between them and are older at this point. But many, women especially, feel it is important to have a child with their current husbands. The question is when is it too old to have a baby?

 

kidmanurban1More and more women are deciding to have children in their 30’s, 40’s and even closer to age 50 today than ever before. Nicole Kidman, age 41, just gave birth to her daughter Sunday Rose this year and she’s in good company. Halle Berry, 41, also gave birth to daughter, Nahla, this year. Jennifer Lopez, age 38, recently gave birth to twins, Max and Emme. Marcia Cross, age 44, gave birth to twins, Savannah and Eden last year. And, Salma Hayek, age 40, gave birth to daughter, Valentina, this year.

 

 

 Celebrities aren’t the only ones who are giving birth later in life. According to a report on pregnancy, in 2006, the pregnancy rate in women over 40 is rising faster than any other age group. As a matter of fact, I know more than a few women that had their children for the first time after age 35 or are in their thirties, but have decided to wait before having children. Most of them based their decision to on their career, the fact that they haven’t found Mr. Right yet or them feeling like they just aren’t ready. Do they have the right idea or not??

 

According to Dr. Skelton, who recently explained on the National Geographic Channel’s program, Animal Aging Secrets, the baby boomers just might be doing the right thing by having children much later in life.

 

“Evidence suggests that the later you produce children, the longer your life span will be,” she says.

 

This research further indicates that after 30, there is a dramatic reduction in oestrogen hormone in women. By leaving it longer before having our first child, we’re giving ourselves a big burst of oestrogen, which helps in many ways – muscle, bone and nervous function. Additionally, scientists say that women who have their last child after age 35 could be reducing her risk of death in each subsequent year by 28 percent compared to a woman who gave birth for the last time at a younger age. It could also mean a later menopausal period and the delayed onset of diseases such as Alzheimer’s for these women.

 

In addition to pregnancy, the act of trying to get pregnant is also helpful in prolonging your life span. Research indicates that a healthy sex life can prove to be beneficial as well. Testoterone levels drop in men and women as they grow older. But sex produces more testoterone, which may help keep our hearts in good shape.

 

So, there you have it.  If you want to live longer, have plenty of sex and babies after 35!

 

BFSO wants to hear from our readers. Did you or have you decided to wait to have children later in life? Perhaps you’re a second wife with no biological children of your own and are just now considering having children. If so, why or why not?

 

 

 

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In the Motherhood

I’m watching Oprah and she’s talking about motherhood. Actress, Cheryl Hines from the new show, In The Motherhood, is talking about the show and several other mothers from around the country are talking about the joys and pitfalls of motherhood.  Additionally, all of the audience is filled with mothers.

As I sit and I watch, honestly, my eyes are rolling in the back of my head and I’m thinking to myself; “what are they whining about?” Now I know that their issues are valid as being a mom is one of the HARDEST thing I’ve ever done. But…being stepmom tops that!!! We deal with the same joys, but  MANY MORE PITFALLS. I challenge all of my traditional moms to think about this – try doing everything that you do, plus deal with someone else’s kids, even crazier schedules, a new baby, an ex-wife who can’t stand you,  a husband who doesn’t understand you, and feel under appreciated and attacked all at the same time!!! After that, you’ll soon realize that you really don’t have it that bad at all.

*Kela*

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